Have you ever marveled at how it is that the local weatherman can be wrong more often than not, and yet still get to keep his job? Well, being a TV weatherperson requires great hair and a winning smile…or at least some knowledge of meteorology, but fear not! You can be an Apple analyst instead and be wrong just as often–maybe more.

Did you know that the iPhone 5 is coming out in June…or is it September...can I get a November? Surely you have heard that it will be equipped with NFC…and that it absolutely will not have NFC. Maybe Apple will surprise everyone and launch the iPhone 5 at the big 10th anniversary celebration of its retail stores this weekend. Or, maybe it will be an iPhone Nano? How about an iPhone 4S?